I can't get this other guy off of my mind and it's driving me nuts! I had a long conversation with my best friend last night, and turns out he has been having the same feelings about his boyfriend as I am having about mine. This is really reassuring because I feel like my friend and I are on the same page, and at least SOMEONE understands. He has been in practically the same situation in the past, and he ended up getting hurt.
The other guy and I spent hours talking about what would happen if we did hook up, and he made sure to let me know that I was very likely to get hurt, because he has no emotional attraction to me whatsoever.
Which is fine, because I wasn't sure if it was just some type of phase I was going through, and maybe after it happened I would totally regret it and come running back to my boyfriend. But! that didn't happen... so now I'm wondering, "do I really want to be in a relationship with my boyfriend?" If I can cheat on him and not feel remorse, what does that mean? I don't feel like I'm a huge slut; it's not like I cheated on him with multiple guys. Just this one guy, who I have had feelings for, but I didn't think they were real, I thought I was just experiencing lust. But now I feel like the feelings are there and there's nothing I can do to stop them. I deleted his number so I can't call him. I tell myself over and over I won't contact him but I usually do, over something stupid. So I'll just wait... hopefully I will hear from him soon. It's probably for the best if I don't though!
Sigh... weak minded humans and their emotions and desires are so stupid...
Aw girlie, I was in the same place last November. I had dated my ex for 4 years and I just couldn't do it anymore. My situation was a little different, he became a drug addict and hurt me badly over and over again. But he would get better and worse, etc.
ReplyDeletePoint is, I had to leave him. I knew I was going to end up fucking this guy I had known from a few years ago and was now super sexy. So, I left him. Shacked up with sexy guy. It was hard, but I am so much happier now.
Kick his ass to the curb. Also, break ups cause tremendous weight loss. I lost like 20 lbs. Do it.
Also, I love your blog :)
Stay strong <3MJ