hi everyone, especially my new followers! sorry i haven't posted in a while, i haven't really had anything interesting to say... i haven't exactly been binging but i haven't been restricting either...
BUT! i have been going to the gym. my legs & arms are sore as sh!t. i've upped my treadmill usage from 2.5 mi./30 mins to 5 mi/1 hour. which isn't anything too impressive- BUT- it means that my body is becoming more efficient. like i said before, i used to be barely able to do 30 mins. on the elliptical, so i need to keep this up.
i also took off my acrylics and i'm not allowing myself to get them until i weigh 120 lbs. ugh i want my acrylics back so bad :( my nails feel naked and my hands look short and stubby! *childish tantrum*
there's a 5k in november that i am most likely going to sign up for as long as i can find a friend to come along. completing a 5k would be a great FUCK YOU to the people who laughed at me when i said i was going to lose weight. and now they're still fat and i'm not (compared to them) ! HAHAHA to you, fatties!
yes i am a very bitter person. i think i'm going to shower and go to the mall.
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Saturday, October 23, 2010
Friday, October 15, 2010
10/15/10
today has been a good day. turned in a paper, went to class, and then i went to the mall, bought two turtlenecks, a fleece vest, and another fleece thing-a-ma-bob (tag says parka) from lands end (all size xs w00t). the lady gave me $15 off too, schwing! then i went to american eagle (my fav. jeans) and I FIT INTO A SIZE TWO!!! YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAHHHH BUDDDDY!!!!!!!!! granted, they were tight and my fat was flopping everywhere, but they BUTTONED!!! (god i feel like such a fatass having to specify that)
then i went to the gym, was at 2.40 miles jogging my heart out and started getting nauseous (you see where this is going). i just blew it off and was trying to reach 2.5 mi. then the nausea was getting worse, and at 2.44 i started gagging. i promptly pressed the emergency stop button and ran to the trash can. i had only eaten around 2 (i had a bubble tea (terrible, i know) and about 5 of my bf/roomies french fries) and just threw up some water. there were only like 2 or 3 people within seeing distance, and i was trying to make eye contact with the girl on a elliptical behind me, but she was specifically avoiding looking at me, i think. so i got back on the treadmill and finished my .06 miles, and lifted for about 20 mins.
then i bought weed. BAD I KNOW. but i'm gonna keep the intake down. I PROMISE. i need my size 4's to be extra loose so i can buy some size 2's (i'm fucking broke as shit and my credit card is maxed out... oops).
anyway, i hope all ya'll had amazing days, and remember: THIN IS IN (lamest saying ever, i know).
high ramblings:
no but seriously, if you want to binge, just remember how amazing it feels to be able to fit into a new size for the first time. as you know, it's an amazing feeling. so DONT FUCK IT UP! (i'm mainly speaking to myself here)
then i went to the gym, was at 2.40 miles jogging my heart out and started getting nauseous (you see where this is going). i just blew it off and was trying to reach 2.5 mi. then the nausea was getting worse, and at 2.44 i started gagging. i promptly pressed the emergency stop button and ran to the trash can. i had only eaten around 2 (i had a bubble tea (terrible, i know) and about 5 of my bf/roomies french fries) and just threw up some water. there were only like 2 or 3 people within seeing distance, and i was trying to make eye contact with the girl on a elliptical behind me, but she was specifically avoiding looking at me, i think. so i got back on the treadmill and finished my .06 miles, and lifted for about 20 mins.
then i bought weed. BAD I KNOW. but i'm gonna keep the intake down. I PROMISE. i need my size 4's to be extra loose so i can buy some size 2's (i'm fucking broke as shit and my credit card is maxed out... oops).
anyway, i hope all ya'll had amazing days, and remember: THIN IS IN (lamest saying ever, i know).
high ramblings:
no but seriously, if you want to binge, just remember how amazing it feels to be able to fit into a new size for the first time. as you know, it's an amazing feeling. so DONT FUCK IT UP! (i'm mainly speaking to myself here)
Thursday, October 14, 2010
ahhh
so, i am officially sick. i guess it's a head cold, if it was the flu i would know, right? and it sucks even more because i only have one class today, and it's supposed to start raining around that time period. walking a mile to class, in the rain, WHILE SICK, is gonna fucking suck.
so i'm almost back down to the weight i was before i started stuffing myself, and i was surprised i didn't gain from yesterday because i ingested THREE FUCKING POUNDS of concord grapes. being from the south, i fucking love muscadine grapes, but they don't have them up north, so i have to settle for the next best thing- concord grapes. which means i definitely went over the 600 cal limit that my lover and i had set for ourselves. but today i honestly feel like shit hole and i can barely taste this hot green tea i made for myself, so hopefully i can keep my intake low/non-existant.
anyway, i hope ya'll are doing fantastic. time to read more blogs. :)
<33333333333
oh, my "bf"/roomie and i carved pumpkins last night. final result:
oh and here's a lady i saw on the street:
pps: this is really fucking embarrassing, but i figure if we can freely talk about laxatives and not eating for days, i can share this. *deep breath* does anyone play neopets/used to play and wants to let me have their old account or be friends in game? i don't LEGIT play, as in spend hours on there, but i do browse around for a little each day and i know that there are a decent number of older players.
anyway, please don't judge me because i play neopets. i also played wow for years (i can attribute my weight gain to this), and i fucking love farmville.
so i'm almost back down to the weight i was before i started stuffing myself, and i was surprised i didn't gain from yesterday because i ingested THREE FUCKING POUNDS of concord grapes. being from the south, i fucking love muscadine grapes, but they don't have them up north, so i have to settle for the next best thing- concord grapes. which means i definitely went over the 600 cal limit that my lover and i had set for ourselves. but today i honestly feel like shit hole and i can barely taste this hot green tea i made for myself, so hopefully i can keep my intake low/non-existant.
anyway, i hope ya'll are doing fantastic. time to read more blogs. :)
<33333333333
oh, my "bf"/roomie and i carved pumpkins last night. final result:
oh and here's a lady i saw on the street:
pps: this is really fucking embarrassing, but i figure if we can freely talk about laxatives and not eating for days, i can share this. *deep breath* does anyone play neopets/used to play and wants to let me have their old account or be friends in game? i don't LEGIT play, as in spend hours on there, but i do browse around for a little each day and i know that there are a decent number of older players.
anyway, please don't judge me because i play neopets. i also played wow for years (i can attribute my weight gain to this), and i fucking love farmville.
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