so... i hate to admit this, but i fell off the wagon this last week. i was doing great, going to the gym every night, keeping my intake low-ish, but then i bought weed.
BIG FUCKING MISTAKE.
i am seriously done with weed until i reach my goal. of course it's not the weed's fault, it's my fault for fucking being a fatass and not giving a shit while i'm high. there was a time when i could smoke and withhold my appetite, but that doesn't happen anymore so i have got to quit the weed.
i haven't been to the gym in 3 days, but after posting this i'm going. halloween is almost fucking here and i've gained 4 fucking pounds... AHHHHHHH- i feel terrible :(
edit- just got back from the gym, and even though i didn't do too much (2.5 miles on the treadmill (1.5 jogging) and half an hour of lifting) i feel GREAT! i can't believe that i flake out on the gym... getting up and going there is the actual hard part, afterwards you feel accomplished and great (even though it will take FOREVER for me to lose what i gained just by being a fat little greedy person, shoving my gullet with anything in my pantry... but i digress).
there's this girl who was in one of my women's studies class... she was super quiet, always had this tote that said to go vegan and stuff, and i always see her at the gym KILLING herself, she is getting smaller and smaller (i would say she's about 110 or so), and i feel that she has some type of ed. of course i could be wrong, but i don't think so. but hey, if she can not be lazy and have determination, more power to her!
the gym girl.. wow :D
ReplyDeletesucks about the weed
hope your alright :)
xoxo
sounds to me like you may have found a potential ana buddy :)
ReplyDeletegosh i would really need one right now...
i love the gym too...it's so good for my mood:) you seem to be the same way!
haha xoxox
what you said about starting being the hardest part is so true!! it applies to a lot of things, like bothering to do music practice, or getting out of a warm bed to have a shower...actually getting off ur ass and doing it is the worst but once you get into it you really enjoy it!
ReplyDeletedw i know you'll get on the right track soon xxx
Aww man, that sucks a lot. Don't stress though darling, I know you can work it off, so do just that. Everybody slips up :( Nice work going to the gym! And it's great that you'd re-engaged yourself into losing. When I gain, I'm like, fuck this ;( And I sit around and mope. But you got right into it, and it's amazing. Great inspiration for me. You'll be fine. Much love to youuuu ;D
ReplyDeleteI always want to know if other people around me have eating disorders. Then we could just all fucking band together and take this on.
ReplyDeleteStaying away from weed sounds much safer & good job getting to the gym! keep it up! xxx
ReplyDeleteI've been eating like a total fatass lately, too :( Right there with you, soulie.
ReplyDeleteWe should start making a calorie restriction table (kinda like ABC) and do it together. And we can text each other and crap to check up. Let me know if you feel a binge coming on and I'll talk you out of it, and vice versa. We can totally do this.
Ex:
Mon: 800
Tues: 400
Wed: 500
Thurs: 300
Fri: 700
etc
What do you think? Tag team this shit.
<3333333333333333333333333333 You're super awesome and amazing, btw.
I always say I'm going to give up weed. It's hard, very hard. but you are a very determined wee girl so I'm 100% that you can do this. If it helps shall I give it up with you?? I'm always looking for a reason to so why not?!?!?
ReplyDeleteLet me know chicky xox